I once was a very concerned new parent. Anxious to do everything right. Struggling to keep up with all the information on parenting. Preoccupied with raising a perfect child from the very beginning. I was determined not to miss a thing. A few years passed, and we had another baby. I was a ‘seasoned’ parent this time around. A bit more relaxed. A little easier on myself. Going with the flow. It was then that I realized how much I had missed out on with my older child.
I wish I could relive my first parenthood. I would not be constantly worried that something bad might happen. I would not obsess about knowing everything there is to know. I would not try to be perfect. Instead, I would take in the precious everyday moments. The small details that get obscured from view in our fast paced, goal oriented life. I would be detail oriented. I would notice the little things that make up the big picture. Like quick paintbrush strokes of an impressionist’s masterpiece. My child’s tiny hand on mine. The softness of her hair. Rocking my baby to sleep.
If only I knew then, what I know now. An eternal longing for an impossible ability to go back in time. That is just the way things are. We make mistakes, we learn from them, we move on. All new moms are bound to be anxious. After all, it is all new to them. But is it really all that new? I wish first time moms were given the credit they deserve. They know a lot more than they think – or are forced to believe – they do. After all, they are moms.
Take your child and go on a trip of a lifetime. Pack some good books, take along some good advice. But most importantly, enjoy the ride.
Live for the Love of it,
The Happy Amateur